What were you doing 12 years ago?
This is one of the new questions I’m asking many of the guests on Raising Playful Tots. Why 12 years ago? 2000 was a significant year. It was when the Y2K bug threatened to turn off all our computers. It was the year I got married. It’s a year that most people can remember where they were and what they were doing.
Time moves so quickly when you have children and we don’t often get time to reflect on the past and plan for the future. Not when we have children under 5 plus multiple demands on our time and energy. I love the glimpse into our recent past and how different our lives were back then. It’s good to see if we’re actually heading in the direction we planned or whether we’ve had a change of heart.
Twelve years ago, What did I know about parenting and raising children other than I wanted to have a bunch someday and definitely not anytime soon?
Fast forward to 2012 and I feel like I’ve come a long long way with plenty of experiences. If I could talk to myself ten years ago before my first child what would I say to myself.
Conversation with myself 10 years ago
- Beware of the comparison trap. It sneaks up on you everywhere. You’re sucked in automatically. You have to decide to pull yourself out every time.
- Follow your own path and be true to yourself ( and family).
- Your experiences are narrower than you believe. Keep your eyes and mind open and you’ll experience more.
- Make a plan for all those ideas. They can’t take flight unless you do.
- Be around people who hold you tight when you’re sad; make you spit your drink with their conversation; inspire you to be better and hold you accountable. Everyone has an influence.
- Listen, observe , ask questions, and learn from many sources. You’ll be amazed at what sticks.
- Establishing your family rhythm takes a while to craft and refine. Refine. Refine. Refine.
- Never be afraid to try and fail. It’s all learning and training.
- Children are young for a season. What we do matters. What we start with them matters.
- Having a family will change everything you know, without exception. They will rock your world. Hold tight.
Bonus: Travel. Take pictures and remember. There is no one way to do things. Besides the kids will ask you what you did before they came along and while you’re having all that fun you’ll have nothing to show them later……perhaps that’s sometimes a good thing. 🙂
What would you tell yourself pre children?
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So true! How I wish I could go back and warn myself for what I was in for before I had children. The best one – refine, refine, refine!
There’s just no way of knowing how different everything is and in a good way too.
Twelve years ago I had never even been in a serious relationship! I’ve learned and grown so much since then, and I feel as if I’m a better person. Luckily, I had done most of the things I wanted to do before I had a child. And I think that I’m doing a pretty good job with him now 🙂
It’s amazing when you look back to see how far you’ve come
1. having a child won’t necessarily unite estranged family members. Your child is YOUR life and more important to you than to anyone else.
2. It’s not easier to make friends with a child than without. You become choosier about who you spend your limited time with.
3. Turn off the TV. Go outside.
I like your 3 Angel especially the first one.